"Longevity is not an age. Anorexia and exercise addiction taught me it's not all about the numbers—not in age or in weight or in calories burned or in heart rate or miles per hour or PRs or all the metrics I used to measure my athletic success." 

– From my TEDx talk

In a world obsessed with numbers, I believe the secret to unlocking the strongest version of ourselves is to reframe our relationship to numbers and see them as just that—numbers. We have phones, Apple Watches, and various devices that tell us how we sleep, how many calories we eat, how many steps we take. We then let these numbers determine how we feel about ourselves. We attach our worth to these devices as if they hold some magical equation that defines our value as humans.

I lost years of my life because a number told me I wasn't enough. I wasn't the perfect number, so I believed I wasn't of value. There’s no equation that can calculate your self-worth and the value you bring to this life. Ironically, numbers weren't additive to my life. They didn’t add value. They didn’t provide certainty. If anything, they did the opposite. They devalued me, clouded my self-confidence, and eroded my self-respect.

You are more than a number, and when you realize that, you unlock what really matters.

Numbers to Think About

1. One. One body you get to live in and live this lifetime out.
2. One. One life you get to live.
3. One person whose permission you need. And that is yours and yours alone. The only opinion that matters is your own.
4. Zero. The number of redo’s you get to live this one life in this one body with this one person. If you only get one shot at this thing called life, then let that be the only number that matters when you decide how you will live it, how you will love it, and how you will thrive.

If you have lost your way and are struggling to reframe your thinking around age and numbers, begin by looking at your values and what makes you, you. They may need an audit as well. What are the cornerstones that you live by? Your foundation. Write them down.

Do you believe in the golden rule? Treat others as you wish to be treated. This simple yet profound principle can be your guiding light. Now, imagine applying this golden rule to yourself. Would you speak harshly to a friend who made a mistake, or would you offer them understanding and kindness? Extend that same grace to yourself. When you falter, remind yourself that self-compassion is not a luxury; it's a necessity. Honor your needs and treat yourself with the same respect and love you offer others.

Do you believe in forgiveness? Wonderful—apply that to yourself as well. Forgive yourself for the mistakes you have made, for the unkindness you have shown yourself and spoken to yourself. Forgiveness is the first step toward healing. It allows you to let go of the past and focus on the present. Embrace the idea that every day is a new opportunity to start fresh, to make better choices, and to be kinder to yourself.

Do you believe in second chances? Excellent—start by giving yourself one. Life is not a straight line; it's a series of twists and turns, and sometimes, you need to give yourself permission to start over. Each day is a second chance to make different choices, to learn from past experiences, and to grow into the person you are meant to be.

It's either one day, or day one. Make today the day you start a different, stronger relationship with yourself and ditch the numbers for the feels.

When you redefine your worth beyond numbers, you unlock the real power within you. Embrace it. Live it. Thrive with it.

If you are struggling with an eating disorder YOU ARE NOT ALONE. The National Alliance for Eating Disorders is there for you. It's FREE & Confidential. Their Hours of operation are Mon - Fri, 9am-7pm EST. Call 1 (866) 662-1235, or visit their website: www.allianceforeatingdisorders.com

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